A Rambling Post About Data, Poker, Rubber Cement, and Being Missed..........with a slight jab at micromanaging administrators

I returned to school on Thursday after a 3-day absence. I could've had the swine flu, could've had a bad sinus infection, could've had bronchitis. Who knows for sure. The symptoms are all very similar and the germs for all three of those ailments have been affecting staff and students for weeks now (and that's not including just good ole ragweed, mountain cedar, and other respiratory system-aggravators). There have been so many germs floating in the air at my school that I've been tempted to wear a bio-suit (except there is no way to get a necktie to wrap around the head apparatus nicely). Plus, they only come in solid baby blue, yellow, or white (bio-suits just don't lend themselves to aesthetic tie coordinations).

Anyway, I was pleasantly amused with the reception. Apparently, people (including some adults) missed me. Or, at least they noticed that I was nowhere to be seen for 3 days. They were, however, probably just envious that I happened to be absent during the rare (yet, lately becoming more common) conglomeration of pointless meetings and meaningless deadlines that created the "Perfect Storm," if you will.

But, I don't want to get negative. I've got plenty of time for negativity. And, I'm sure I'll have plenty of other opportunities to share. I just wanted to point out that my students were very happy to see me (and to be quite honest, I really wasn't happy to see them). I got a few hugs, some smiles, some pats on the shoulder, some genuine comments, and some thoughtful "homemade" cards. The students probably knew what I had been going through, since most of them already went through it last week. I'm pretty sure one of the little buggers gave me the nice virus.

Anyway, it was nice to feel "welcomed back" and "missed." I guess they really do need structure and consistency. Apparently the sub let them run amok. And apparently the sub was "mean."

And, I thought I was mean.

I get home almost every day feeling like I've been an ass. Not a good feeling.

But, I guess I'm really not. Not mean, that is..... Or, an ass for that matter. Anyway, I'm stern and fair for the most part. I try to help them as much as I can, and I don't demean any of them. A little over a week ago, I did kick a chair out of frustration (a strategically placed outburst, of course).

So, to get to the point.... they missed me. I, however, did not miss them. They are a very challenging group this year (academically, behaviorally, and socially). I mean, I have students that can't read 6-digit numbers (or more) with any kind of consistency. I have kids that have no concept of "borrowing". I have kids that want to add for every single word problem they encounter. Challenging, to say the least.

Then, I have a whole army of administrative "over-seers" making my job harder, by demanding that I work "smarter." Ahh... but, we're drifting into that good-ole negativity again, aren't we? Not going to go there on this post. Sorry.

So, as I was saying.....my students missed me, but I did not miss them. These students are my "cards." The hand that I have been dealt. I doubt that I can make a "Full House" with this deck of cards. My administrators....all of them....from my boss, my boss' boss, my boss' boss' boss to the coaches that my boss' boss has seen fit to assign to our campus to the academic coordinator are always preaching "data." Look at the data, chart the progress, look at areas of weakness, use an intervention, check the data again, yada yada yada. They expect me to come up with a "Royal Flush." However, it is hard to get that kind of hand when you start off with a 3 of spades and a 7 of diamonds.

But, for all the over-emphasis on data, there is one aspect that the "data-preachers" always seem to neglect. The human aspect. These kids are not just numbers. They're human beings. They can be resilient. I need to get it in my head to stop looking at them as numbers. Numbers are what make me go home at the end of the day, feeling like I've been an ass. Humans are what make me go home at the end of the day, feeling like I'll be missed.

It's been 6 weeks. A full grading period. Today, my students let me know that they missed my presence. I think the bond is starting to solidify. I think, maybe next time, I'll miss them.